Everyone keeps asking me if the first month went fast. Honestly? I didn't feel like it did all that much. I think it helped that I got to have 2 weeks of rest with just Israel for the most part while I recovered from my c-section. I can't recommend that enough. It was a wonderful bonding experience with my new little guy and definitely what he and I needed. He is my little monkey...clinging to me always.
I, Mallory Crain, did in fact give birth to that baby. Please be impressed. I call him my sumo baby. I am proud.
You are the son we never knew we needed. The little boy who has stolen our hearts and then some. You have made your presence known in this house, that's for sure. You are a little man with a need for 24/7 snuggles. Everyone grants your wishes happily. We called you a high needs baby, but as it turns out, it was mommy's accidental caffeine intake that was causing your screaming fits. Now, we call you "Grumpy Gus" because honestly? You are one grumpy boy. If you aren't being held, while standing, and bouncing up and down, you tend to use your voice...a lot. Let's just say we were never worried about your lungs. We also find it sweet how you need that physical connection. I wear you in the Moby every day. Your big sister adores you. She also smothers you. I think you two are going to be close...or Eden will make you be her friend. You look like an identical copy of your daddy, but with a teensy bit of mommy thrown in for good measure. You have daddy's eyes, ears, skin color, height, fingers, and toes, but you have mommy's nose and look like her grandpa Ray. As for your growth? Oh dear boy, you don't stop growing! This is a shock after having your sister who struggled to stay on the charts. You have gained a pound a week since leaving the hospital and you have gotten so long. You LOVE to eat so I attribute that to your great size. Nights were extremely hard with you and you stayed awake almost the entire night every night. You dislike stimulation. Bouncers, play mats, toys...all of them make you angry. Israel John, you were the exact child God planned for our family and we are so thankful you are in our lives! You are one well loved little boy!
Easter is by far the most important holiday to me. Not my favorite to decorate for, but that's not really what Easter is about anyway. Although I believe it is important to celebrate our Savior every day, I really appreciate having that one day to truly celebrate what He has done for us. Jesus died for me. That is huge. I do not ever want to forget what He has done for me.
This year I had to forego the usual Easter festivities and traditions so that Israel and I could continue to rest and recover at home. Josh was able to take Eden to our church's annual Easter egg hunt...which she thoroughly enjoyed. On Sunday I was able to head up the stairs (something I have only done twice since being home) and enjoy a meal with the family, egg painting with Eden, and an egg hunt on the front lawn. I missed church greatly, but was thankful for our "home church" where we played a couple videos from the Jesus Storybook Bible for Eden and then watched last year's sermon from David Platt. Speaking of him, if you want to be challenged in a major way, listen to his series on James. Each sermon was amazing.
Now on to some photos of my sweet babies...
I seriously love these two. They confirm that I want a big family each and every day.
Her hair kills me.
Nothing better than my two babies out in the sunshine.
I haven't been able to take all the photos I want of the littlest Crain due to being confined to the couch 24/7...although I have been blowing up Instagram...but I did manage to sneak a few photos after a diaper change earlier today. He changes so much each day. Oh my goodness I love this kid so much.
Can I be honest with you all? My mama heart is struggling this week. I bonded with Israel immediately. This is all thanks to a fabulous birth experience...which has been written, I just need to finish it up and add some photos. Obviously I am thankful for this, but there is one thing that has been bothering me. I have noticed a little bit of fear creeping in. The biggest one came during his three very heavy spit up episodes where he choked and had trouble breathing. It was extremely scary each time and in fact Josh and I took turns checking on him throughout the night last night. I try to be strong and remember that Israel, while entrusted into my care, is truly God's child. And yet...I broke. I saw him struggling to breathe, and I completely lost all sense. I bawled. I have known him for 9 months in my tummy and 11 days out in the world, and yet I feel like he has been a part of me forever. I am usually pretty calm about these things, but something in me snapped. I know this is "normal," but it pains me all the same.
I am so thankful for our two babies. They both add something into our family that is unique and fun and perfect. I know there are many tough days ahead, but I do not want to lose sight of the blessings we have.
He is here!!!
@ 9:34 a.m.
7 lb. 12 oz.
20 inches long
You guys. We are in love!! Honestly this boy has brought so much more fun into this house. I knew I loved him from the day God placed him into my belly, but wow. We just didn't realize just how much love that kid could take from us when the doctor placed him in our arms. Neither of us realized we missed having a newborn around until now. Israel is seriously amazing. Eden LOVES her baby brother. Sometimes I don't think she realizes he actually has a name...just "baby brudder." She thinks I feed him from my tummy. Hilarious. Trust me, I have every intention of writing his birth story because I think it was a pretty great one...and it wasn't traumatic this time..HOORAY! We were able to leave the hospital just 2 days after having him so we have been able to be home since yesterday and loving being a family of four (plus Bella of course). I can't wait to tell you all more about him.
I love my little family more than I could have ever imagined.
Thank you God for blessing us so much. I still feel like I am living in a dream.
*All pictures taken by my very talented friend, Charissa Bernard. Thank you so much Charissa for capturing our first day so perfectly!
>> March 19, 2013 – rantings
I wanted to share a quick something with you all today. Something that doesn't cost money, but does require a tiny bit of effort. Something I think is worth it. Let me give you a back story (don't I always feel the need to do this?!).
Pregnancy is not my best time. I know I am so beyond blessed to have carried two babies. Trust me, I realize the blessing that is when so many people are unable to do the same. My heart aches for you, really it does. I do my best to not be the typical complaining pregnancy lady. I find complaining to be quite ugly really. Although, this pregnancy has been much more painful so I did start to feel a little more compassion to those that whine about all of those aches and pains...I actually really got it this time. The worst part of pregnancy for me is the hormones. My attitude is quite lame honestly. And my patience? Non-existent. This bothers me a ton and takes a lot of prayer to try to get past it. Then there is the whole...I'm already a control freak who obsesses over cleanliness and then gets nesting thrown on top of that and well, I am certifiably crazy.
Guess who bears the brunt of my crazies? The husband. My best friend. The father of my babies.
This hurts me and I know it hurts him...although the rockstar that he is, he doesn't even say a word and just keeps helping me through it all. Thanks babe!
So I was reading somewhere one day (probably a blog because that's where I get a lot of inspiration these days) and I saw the suggestion to stop complaining and nagging your husband over all the little things that make you frustrated and just do it.
Enter the shower curtain.
I am not OCD, but I do consider myself borderline sometimes. Little things will make me crazy. The way the soap dispenser is facing, toilet paper must always be refilled and obviously the toilet paper goes over and not under, pillows get put a certain way, etc. Yes, I know it is crazy, but these are the things that help my chaotic life feel a little less chaotic. So, what is it about a seemingly harmless shower curtain that makes me insane? It MUST be pushed back to the right side (i.e. the side where all the toiletries are sitting, NOT the side with the faucet). Crazy right? But it drives me insane if it is any other way. Sadly, my poor husband does not understand this.
In one of my hormonal rampages, I was frustrated that once again the toilet paper roll was empty, socks were left lying on the floor, and the shower curtain was THE WRONG WAY. I was thisclose to having one of my crazy episodes when I remembered what I had read about not nagging and just fixing whatever is bugging you. So, I did it. I grumbled a bit under my breath, but honestly, it wasn't that big of a deal.
I've been doing this for a couple of months now. I can pretty much guarantee Josh has not noticed and probably didn't realize how annoyed I was at it. And you know what? I wasn't doing it so that he would notice. Usually I would want him to take note that I am this great wife who is doing such a great thing. But really? I just want to serve him with a happy heart. I hadn't realized how much I was struggling with the serving part. I mean, I cook him dinner, wake him up for work, clean up the house...isn't that enough?! Answer? NOPE.
You may be reading this and you may not have a husband. So, who else can you serve today? A friend? A family member? A coworker? Try it. It may not come natural at first, sure didn't for me, but soon enough you may be able to do it with a smile on your face. Seriously. And maybe I am the only person out there who freaks out about seemingly insignificant things and struggles with nagging...so um, hello, welcome to my life.
I almost didn't post this. Mainly because I didn't want this to look like I was saying, "LOOK AT ME!!!" and obviously Josh will read this and will know what I have been doing. But, I felt like it was something that needed to be shared and honestly? It will challenge me to find other ways to serve him.
So...GO. Go fix that shower curtain. Don't say a word and just do it. SERVE.
Oh and in ever dramatic Mallory fashion, I may have taken a trip to the hospital once already. At 37 weeks. I peed my pants. Don't ask.
I have loved being pregnant with friends. I don't want to forget that my friend Sarah and I have our c-section scheduled for the same morning. Yes, we live in two different states, but it has been fun to have that to look forward to together. Now we are both excited to see which baby comes first! I also have a friend who is being induced the day after my surgery, by the same doctor, which means we will be hospital buddies! I am so determined to have a better experience this time that I truly believe I am going to be able to get up and move around and go meet her baby girl. And, probably the most special thing I want to remember is that Israel shares the same due date as his little "cousin," Hayley. Ruby and I were both due on March 28th. Ironically, I'll be having him a week early and she had Hayley almost a week late. They won't share birthdays, but just having shared that date seems pretty special to me.
I just cannot believe the time is here. All the planning, worrying, excitement...it all comes down to one day. Soon enough I know I will look back and wonder what life was like without our little boy even though right now I can't figure out what life will be like with him. More chaotic for sure, and yet, so much more wonderful. That I am sure of.
Just for fun, I also want to make sure to remember some guesses we have about our little man. Eden guessed that he will have pink eyes. Let's hope she is wrong on that one. For some reason I have always pictured him as having dark hair and dark eyes. I don't know if that is because in my family I was the blondie when EVERY SINGLE OTHER PERSON in my family has black hair or what. It is just what I picture. I also think of him as having more of my brother's personality. Laid back, but still great at bugging his sister. He may end up being more of a class clown like Josh, so we will see. Eden uses up so much energy that I am not sure if we can have two highly energetic kids around. Thankfully Bella sleeps for all of us. As for size, Josh and I both feel pretty confident he will be in the upper 6 pound range. Maybe 6 lbs 10 ounces? We will see soon enough!
Alright....next time I blog about the baby it should be a picture of him!!!!!